Past, Present, and Future

Past, Present, and Future

Hello from Pennsylvania! In case you haven’t heard the exciting news, I have been accepted with One Mission Society to continue serving in Haiti, this time, as a first-grade teacher at Cowman International School! I am so thankful for God’s faithfulness in His call for my life as His plans continue to amaze me as they unfold.

I’ve been in Bensalem for about a month now and this “in between” feeling is new to me. I’ll elaborate a little bit on how I feel like I’m stuck between the Past, Present, and Future.

Past

Okay, so when I say “past” I really don’t mean that far into my history, just the past year. I just finished my first year of teaching, my first year living away from home, and my first year living in a foreign culture. As challenging as it could be at times, I loved it. I loved my housemates, I loved my community, and I loved my class. My thoughts have been stuck on Susie’s return to Canada and Erin’s move and on nights of Hawaii 5-0. My thoughts have especially been, though, on my fourth graders. Those 10 kids became like my own children and 6/10 of them shed tears at the end of the year because I wouldn’t be their 5^th grade teacher. (I’m talking sobs from 4/10 of them!) I wonder if they are having fun this summer, if they are eating enough, and if they are talking through the tough stuff. I wonder if they are practicing their multiplication (probably not) and if they are reading at all (I hope so!). I wonder if they are thinking of me too and if I really made an impact on them last year.

Present

My favorite part of being in my stateside home is being with my family. I have to remind myself that my time with them is short and to not focus on the past or future too much. I’m enjoying watching my sister play basketball and quoting movies with my brother. I’m enjoying going to thrift stores with my mom and talking about animals with my dad. I’m enjoying eating ice cream (and lots of it!) and chocolate and my dad's cooking.

The most humbling part of being here is fundraising. I am completely reliant on people’s faith promises and special gifts to continuing living and ministering in Haiti. Telling stories of what God is doing there and showing pictures of my kiddos is exciting, but seeing people’s response is so humbling as they sacrifice to partner with me. I hate asking for money, but seeing people give so generously and freely leaves me in awe.

If you want to partner with me, click: https://onemissionsociety.org/give/kacieloucks

Future

       Lord willing, after I’m finished fundraising, I will return to Haiti at the end of August to start my 2^nd year of teaching! My mind also wanders to this and I’ve even found myself having dreams about the first day of first grade. I’m so excited to move down and work with younger kids, but I’m also nervous. I’m wondering how I’ll memorize 27 names so quickly. I’m wondering if I’ll be a good partner with my co-teacher and assistant. I’m wondering how I’ll introduce writing workshop and what books the kids will like best at read-aloud. I’m wondering if I can build a strong bond with them all and make an impact on them. I’m wondering if it’s possible for a classroom to have too many elephants. There will be so many firsts in this first year of first grade! I’m sure it will be a blast and I can’t wait to tell you stories as it progresses!

For now, though, I’ll leave the past as it is and pray for my fourth, now fifth, graders. I’ll live in the present and enjoy time with my family, friends, and church. And I’ll continue to look forward to what God has planned in the future. 

Stop and Enjoy!

“Stop and enjoy!”

She yells it as I take in the chaos of the other children in the house running around the room screaming with the joy that comes with childhood.

“Stop and enjoy!”

She tells me as we work hard on learning her letters and shapes. I smile at her because her focus and speaking skills have grown so much in the time I’ve known her.

“Stop and enjoy!”

She whispers as I ask her to calm down her hyper self so we can read her favorite books while she lays in my lap.

“Stop and enjoy…”

I’m not quite sure that 8 year old A even really knows what that phrase means, (even though she uses it in a decent context) but that catchphrase of hers has stuck with me ever since she started using it a couple of months ago.

March and April have been crammed pack with fun, comfort-stretching, growth-making, hard but oh-so-good moments. Through it all, I’ve had handfuls of moments where I’ve had to listen to A’s voice in my head to just “stop and enjoy” what God is doing here in Haiti and in my life.

I stop and enjoy the beauty found in God’s creation in Haiti where the contrast between beauty and poverty sit side by side.

 

I stop and enjoy as I realize how many blessings come out of Bethesda Clinic, OMS’ clinic on our compound. So many people, including me and Susie, have benefited from its service. Dr. Rodney, the head doctor, strives to make sure that every patient receives quality physical care, but never leaves out sharing about Jesus!

These are my pneumonia free lungs (after 2 months of  it!)! :D

I stop and enjoy know that "my kids" know that they are loved by me and by God. 

I stop and enjoy chapel on Friday mornings with Cowman School as all of our student’s sing that they love Jesus “down deep in their hearts.” 

I stop and enjoy doing resurrection eggs with my fourth graders as we declare that Jesus is risen and sing that grace wins every time.

I stop and enjoy celebrating Easter away from family for the first time with friends that have become family.

I stop and enjoy the feeling of tiny hands playing with my hair at the Potter’s House or bigger hands styling my hair at school.

  

I stop and enjoy and marvel that this is my life and I am so blessed and content with it. In fact, here’s the exciting part…

I’ve just received word that I have officially been accepted with OMS as a longer term missionary! This means that I will get to, Lord willing, live and minister in Haiti for at least two more years! 😊

Stay tuned for ways you can help make this happen! 

Discombobulated Thoughts

Discombobulated Thoughts

      Hello! First of all, I apologize for the lack of posting in 2017 so far. Every time I would start to write, something would interrupt or my thoughts would jumble. I am also currently on my third round of antibiotics since New Year’s for what was/is some sort of respiratory/sinus infection that just might have been walking pneumonia. Please forgive me! J  We are now on spring break and this the first actual  “pause” I have taken since December. 

   So… I thought about writing about embracing the “messy” parts of life, like building cross-cultural friendships, working with kids from hard places, or navigating tough decisions about the future without having my mom close by.

     I thought about copying my housemate Susie’s idea on writing about the verse that states, “How beautiful are the feet of those who share the good news.” Because, you see these feet?

They are almost always dusty, peeling, and mosquito bitten, and a little bit sore. Beautiful is not the word I would use for them. (And yes, I know that’s not what the Bible literally meant).

     But finally, as I walked home from school hand-in-hand with a couple of my girlies, I decided I would show some pictures of things that have made me reflect on what love has looked like the past couple months.

      Love is freshly picked flowers from my students.

      Love is half-birthday celebrations.

Love is notes from my mom.

      Love is friends taking you to get food when your lazy.

      Love is a “Sign if you love your teacher!” board.

      Love is fourth grade completing 100 acts of kindness.

      Love is chocolate from a stranger for loving on her kids when she can’t.

      Love is having personal hairstylists almost every day.

      Love is “Have you had enough water today, Miss Kacie?”

      Love is school supplies from pen-pals.

      Love is a picture drawn of my and student with the words, “This is me and my teacher. I love her and I know she loves me.”

      Love is long talks and Hawaii 5-0 with housemates. (We need more pictures!)

     Love is “Kacie! Eske ou manje ak nou souple?” “Will you eat with us please?”

      Love is morning hugs.

      Love is students praying for me and each other.

      Love is a “pixie dust holder.”

      Love is handmade dresses from mom & grandma for the orphanage.

Love is a happy face on my sidewalk “because you love everything cute.”

Love is this:

Fourth Grade Lessons

Fourth Grade Lessons

I’m not sure how many people I’ve told, but teaching fourth graders was never on my bucket-list. All my life, I have wanted to work with little kids. My mom and mommom have passed on enough materials that I could teach preschool without much preparation. So when my two supervisors from student teaching in Haiti asked me to teach fourth grade this year, I was a bit skeptical (and if I’m being honest, a bit scared too).

Now that we are half way through the second marking period though, I can say that that has changed! Every day isn’t a piece of cake, but I love my fourth graders. I love how I can have real, deep conversations with them and really work through our material. In the process of me learning how to teach them in the most effective ways, they’ve been teaching me some things along way. I thought I’d share some lessons from fourth grade.

1.)            Be silly!

2.)          Be kind.

3.)          Don’t forget to play.

4.)          Ask questions.

"Miss Kacie, how many galaxies are there?““Are elk bigger than deer?” “How big is the sun compared to earth?” “What is the world’s biggest insect?” (Thank God for Google!) 

     

http://pics-about-space.com/

5.)          Love all of God’s creations.

Ok, so this one is kinda my fault. I'm one that cannot kill a bug without feeling guilty..It annoys people, but I can't help it, I promise! :P .I may have turned many of my students into that too. Where they used to freak out at bugs, spiders, snakes, etc. they now are curious and kind. Now, instead of screaming at a giant spider, they say, "Aww! It's so cute! Let's move our stuff so that he can be safe where he is." 

6.)          Dig deep into God’s Word.

This one goes alongside the questions one. They have so many impressive questions about the Word! Where did dinosaurs go and where are they in the Bible? (Genesis & Job in case you were wondering) What does the Bible say about angels? What will heaven be like? If Jesus was born in 4 A.D., how was He at creation? How can one God have three persons? I love these questions as it makes me dive deep into the Bible to make sure I am teaching them correctly. It is also evidence that they are thinking through these issues at a young age! 

7.)          Sing “Bless the Lord (10,000 reasons)” whenever it comes to mind.

This is some of my kids' favorite song (which I love)! We started adding in some worship song time to our Bible time recently. I've found that it really sets the pace of the day and makes everyone in a better mood. This song though, it's not just sung at Bible time...It is hummed while I am teaching. It is done as a duet, quartet, 11-tet as we are doing stations. It is begged for at chapel. It brings a calm across the room as we sing, "Bless the Lord oh my soul. Worship His Holy name. Sing like never before, oh my soul, worship His holy name." 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XtwIT8JjddM

8.)          Pray boldly.

One of the best decisions I've made this year is to turn from one or two people praying each day to doing "popcorn prayers." Though there are some that will whine that it takes too long, for the most part they offer up pure, bold prayers about so many things. I just have to give you some examples. 

"God, thank you for all that you have made and all you have given us. Please comfort those who don't have as much."

"God, thank you that we go to a school where we can grow more in you. Please be with those who cannot hear about You at school and with those who cannot even go to school. Help them find a way to learn about you."

"Lord, please come back soon so we can see the New Heaven and New Earth...but God give us enough time to tell more people about you so that no one will spend forever without you"

"Let the bad guys stop doing wrong, and turn to You so that others will see and do the same." 

"Thank you for loving us. Help kids without parents get to go home soon with forever families."

"Help the people dealing the flood so that they can fix their homes, find food, and a safe place to sleep." 

I'm telling you- when these kids really pray, I get the goosebumps and feel the Spirit in my classroom. I even told them that I don't care when it takes more than 5 minutes to pray because I imagine God listening and smiling in Heaven at us. 

9.)          Hug often.

If you have questions about this one, please see my post about my "clingy class." ;) . 

10.)        There is something way more important than lesson plans, conferences, and standards. These 4th graders "love Jesus deep down in their hearts!" ♡

What I’m Here For

What I’m Here For

          Everyone knows that a teacher’s life isn’t easy. There are endless lessons to plans, papers to grade, standards to meet, and students to reach. Even in Haiti, separated from mainstream education systems, these things can be exhausting. These past two weeks though, I’ve gotten many reminders as to my purpose of being here this year.

          My class and I have sort of an agreement. We can have fun and run things differently as long as we are safe, respectful, and learning. This works out well for us usually and allows for our small class bond to grow. I started to feel though, that maybe we were too close and that they were too clingy. It started with read aloud time where I just read through a fun novel. Instead of sitting at their seats, I allow them to sit on the floor or in the coveted comfy chairs. Now, most of my students want to be right up next to me or at my feet within reach. At snack/ first recess time, they want to spend it inside with me. At lunch, it’s a race to see who will ask me to sit with them first. Then recess comes and they still want to sit and talk with me. (Note: this is not every day and every time, they still play with their friends, but it is a very common occurrence). It was to the point where all my food/recess/break time that I use for prep was taken up each day.

          The teacher in me would groan. Didn’t they realize I had work to do, copies to make, lessons to plan? All the work that comes with giving them their education? Then I felt a nudge from God reminding me why I am here and why I ever wanted to be a teacher in the first place. I’m here for the relationships. I’m here for the hugs, the laughs, the drying of tears, the lunch table discussions. I’m here for the hand-in-hand walk down sidewalk in the mornings, for the “Miss Kacie, did you know”s, the never-ending stories, and lame fourth grade jokes. I want them to confide in me when they are frustrated with more than a math problem and trust me to know their fears and life questions. I want them to see how I live my life and think that maybe they want to follow my Jesus too.

          After this reminder, I found a lot more joy in my days and a lot less exhaustion. I am still definitely tired, but it’s that good fulfilled, satisfied tired. I enjoy sitting with them and taking part in their conversations. While some days the conversations are wacky, others bring a lot of nine-year-old wisdom. No matter what the case, our time is now being cherished a whole lot more and I look forward to what the rest of the year will bring to me and my clingy class.